


New Year's Day

by writingbygab



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: 22x4, Amanda's thoughts, F/M, Mutual Pining, Post New Years, and feelings, and the ending to that night we all deserved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:56:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29595207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writingbygab/pseuds/writingbygab
Summary: Amanda comes back home to Sonny after work pulled her away from the night. She grapples with the feelings that she has for her old partner, now turned ADA, now turned maybe something more than a friend.Takes place during 22x04
Relationships: Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr./Amanda Rollins
Comments: 8
Kudos: 65





	New Year's Day

**Author's Note:**

> I am just saying that as of now there is no proof this didn't not happen. So let's just pretend they're not annoying for one sec.

Amanda keeps her focus on the road in front of her and does her best to avoid the piles of snow along the way. Driving in the snow in Manhattan is something she is convinced she’ll never get used to.

It felt weird to be in a new year, no longer having the ability to blame 2020 for the issues the world faces is almost like a loss of a crutch. Cause here she is, no longer in 2020, and a thirteen-year-old girl is being raped by her foster father. Seems never ending.

She takes a deep breath and releases, telling herself to let it go, it’ll be okay. They would easily convict him, and he would go to prison. The guy tried to self-induce an abortion for gods sake. Carisi will have no issue with it.

Carisi. Dominick.

She almost forgot he’s in her apartment right now. Probably still on her couch and worried about what kind of mess the squad encountered. She misses him as her partner, there’s no question about that. Kat and Fin are great, but his presence was like a soothing medicine she became addicted to. Being forced to quit it was rough.

But she couldn’t fully. And she knows why.

She tried to cross the line and declare it when she sat on his desk and asked him to get drinks with her. It was her best move. Her southern charm at its peak, her hair pushed back, her words ringing with subtext. But when he declined, she only then realized it might be too late for them.

Inviting him over tonight was such a spur of the moment thing. When he agreed she felt like she was a schoolgirl who’s crush just tagged her on the playground. It meant nothing, but everything at the same time.

They weren’t cops or lawyers tonight, they were two friends in a confusing but comfortable state of probably something more. When she started to drift to sleep on the couch, he was the one who moved closer so she could lean onto him. His medicinal property of comfort was addictive, and she was still dependent.

Again, it was nothing, yet everything. At least to her.

She parks on the street and walks up to her building. Bearing the cold that is only present in the early mornings of New York without the flashing lights.

She slowly opens the apartment door, not wanting to wake anyone up if they are asleep. Lo and behold, Sonny is passed out on the couch, with the kitchen lights still on and the TV still replaying the ball drop. The blanket she was using earlier is now draped on top of him.

She wants to just let him lie there, but she knows he has a handful of depositions in the morning. The whole reason he got to spend New Year’s with her and not his family. Amanda almost feels like she should thank the DA for overworking him for tonight.

She sits on the couch where his feet are and shakes him a little to wake him.

“Hey,” She says as he starts to wake up. “I’m back.”

Sonny sighs and rubs his face as he starts to regain consciousness. “What time is it?”

“Almost 3 am.” She responds, her hand still resting on the blanket over his leg. “You’re more than welcome to stay, but I figured you’d wanna go home.”

He sits up and sighs again, “Yeah. You okay? What happened?”

Amanda shouldn’t be surprised as how attractive his sleepy voice is. His accent is already beautiful, him barley being awake just empathizes it.

“Yeah… I’ll tell you about it and make you some coffee for the road.” She says standing up and heading to the kitchen.

As she brews him coffee, she tells him about the case they worked tonight and now have to deal with alongside his office.

“Jesus.” He responds, the story obviously jolting him awake. “And she says she’s in love with him? What is he sayin’?”

“We haven’t talked to him yet. We’re gonna have in come into the station in the morning.” She takes the coffee off the stove and pours it into one of her reusable cups.

“But yeah. So much for 2020 ending and taking away all of our problems.”

He laughs. “I think we knew 2021 wasn’t goin’ to be our savior, but”

He grabs the coffee cup and holds it up, “Here’s to it bein’ less shitty at the very least.”

She laughs and leans her body on the counter, the night finally catching up with her. “Wow, two curse words from you in less than 5 minutes. You really have changed.”

He laughs as he sips some of the coffee before looking at her in a way that makes her head buzz. “Nah, I just tend to make stupid decisions at this time of night.”

They lock eyes and she wonders if he’s alluding to the first time they almost crossed the line of partnership. Standing in the middle of nowhere West Virginia in the doorway of a cheap motel.

She almost did it. But she stopped herself.

She wanted to stop being so predictable. She wanted to stop sleeping with the guys she worked with. It never ended well.

She figured the longing that felt like a magnet between them would fade. The chemistry would simmer down in some way or another. It always eventually did.

But the attraction she has for him now, all these years later, feels like a pot about to reach its boiling point. Her responsibility turning into silent torment of simply stolen glances for each other.

“I should get goin’, I gotta be in court in six hours.” Carisi says, standing up from the counter that still has the pizza boxes he brought them.

“Yeah, well thanks for coming and then for staying with them... I seriously appreciate it.” She says as she grabs his jacket from the kitchen counter to give to him.

“Of course, thanks for havin’ me.” He says taking it from her hands. “It was, fun.”

They stand there for a minute, unsure of how to properly say goodbye to each other.

“I’ll walk you out.” She suddenly offers, buying her time, and starts to walk to the living room to grab her own jacket.

“No, Manda it’s okay. I’m right out front, go get some sleep.” He responds, stopping her by holding her arm, firm but gentle. “I’ll see you in a few hours, alright?”

“Yeah... yeah alright.” She ducks her head and feels silly that she needs the affirmation, like he can obviously tell how she feels. The thought makes her cheeks go pink.

“Well, happy new year.” He says as he walks to the door to let himself out.

“Dominick.” She suddenly says as his hand reaches the doorknob.

He turns around, his eyes soft and his eyebrows raised. Every time she calls him his full name it’s like casting a spell on him.

“Seriously thank you. And not just for tonight. You... still got my back and I can’t tell you... how much I appreciate that.”

His eyes are wide now, as if they just transported back in time, back in the West Virginia motel doorway. Both of them looking through a seeing glass, wondering if they can change fate.

He looks away from her and down at his hand on the door handle once again. She expects him to reject her once more. Maybe she can now finally move on. Get over it. Over him.

But then he looks back up and over at her. There’s a beat of unnerving silence before he laughs and shakes his head.

“Fuck it.” He exclaims. Walking back over to her, setting the coffee mug back on the counter, and swiftly grabbing her face.

He kisses her chastely at first, and she immediately sighs into it. The pot reaching its boiling point and spilling over. Finally.

He holds onto her jaw and deepens the kiss, she moans as she reciprocates, and allows herself to feel the sensation of his warm mouth on her still chilly lips as she grabs onto the front of his sweatshirt for balance.

He pulls away for a minute, and rests his forehead onto hers, both of them breathing heavily. He leans in and kisses her simply one last lingering time, before breaking away, grabbing the coffee mug again, and walking back towards the front door.

She can’t help but to just stand there, completely shocked and still breathing shallowly.

“I’ll see you later.” He repeats, hand once again on the doorknob. As if she had just imagined the last few minutes.

She nods and manages to speak out a “Yeah, later.”

And with that he slips away, and Amanda is left alone in the new year.

But a lot more hopeful that it is going to be a better one.


End file.
